Chris and Alan usually arrive with
a new diversion.
Was this their latest? Let's hope so.
Ageism and Attitudes towards Older People.
How to know when you are growing old.
- Everything hurts - what doesn't hurt doesn't work
- The gleam in your eye is the sun hitting your bifocals.
- You feel like the morning after but haven't been anywhere.
- Your children begin to look middle aged.
- You join a health club but don't bother going.
- You know all the answers, but no-one asks the questions.
- Your house is too big and your medicine chest isn't big enough.
- Your birthday cake collapses from the weight of the candles.
- You stick your teeth into a steak and they stay there.
- Your knees buckle but your belt won't.
- You sit in a rocking chair and can't make it go.
- You turn out the light for economy instead of romance.
- You need glasses to find glasses.
- You get winded playing cards.
- Your back goes out more than you do.
- You look forward to a dull evening.
- You just want to live long enough to be a problem to your kids.
- Your kids check that you have been to the loo before they take you in their
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